Unequally Yoked by Pastor Gary
In 2 Corinthians 6:11-18 we read, “O Corinthians! We have spoken openly to you, our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted by your own affections. Now in return for the same (I speak as to children), you also be open. Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said: ‘I will dwell in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they shall be My people. Therefore, come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you. I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters,’ says the Lord Almighty” (NKJV).
The context of Paul’s writing in 2 Corinthians 6:11-18 was reconciliation. Paul was dealing with a schism created by those who resented Paul for asserting his apostolic authority ( 1 Cor 5), regarding the immoral brother’s behavior. The unfortunate reality of this passage is that many ignore its context and create judgments and dogmas that Paul did not intend and God did not want conveyed.
What does it mean to be unequally yoked? In the Believer’s Bible Commentary it states, “Mention of the unequal yoke suggests Deuteronomy 22:10: “You shall not plow with an ox and a donkey together.” The ox was a clean animal and the donkey unclean, and their step and pull were unequal.” The commentator is suggesting the clean (Christian) should not work alongside an unclean (non-Christian.). The IVP Background Bible Commentary asserts, “He bases 6:14 “unequal yoking” on Deuteronomy 22:10 (Lev 19:19), which may have been meant to reinforce the law’s prohibition of interreligious marriage with pagans (Deut 7:3; Ezra 9:12; Neh 13:25).”
This commentary suggests the meaning pertains to marriage: a Christians should not marry non-Christians. The Woman’s Study Bible observes, “Paul most likely was referring to associations with false apostles. He considered these false prophets responsible for the recent schism in his relationship with the Corinthian church (2 Cor 11:13–15). This is the most consistent with the context. The Nelson Study Bible says, “Paul was not encouraging isolation from unbelievers (see 1 Cor 9:5–13) but discouraging compromise with their sinful values and practices.
He was urging them (and us) to maintain integrity in the world just as Christ did (see John 15:14–16; Phil 2:14–16). The five antithetical questions Paul poses would seem to support The Nelson’s Study Bible’s claims. As the righteous sons and daughters of the light and subjects in Christ’s kingdom, we must recognize that we have a different part to play. We live not to build our own kingdom, but to be the temple of God. We are God’s representatives on the earth. We should be separate: different from the world.
Relegating the meaning of this passage to a few issues, robs its impact and distorts its meaning. The KJV Bible Commentary states, “Separation from the ungodly and those who compromise their Christian standards is a basic biblical doctrine related to church discipline.” Are you yoked to Christ? Are you a disciplined Christian? Do your daily activities and behaviors reflect that yoke-fellowship? Being unequally yoked is not about a specific issue, as much as it is a daily self-evaluation of one’s loyalties and devotion.
Derrick here: It is obviously not a matter of not coming in contact with unbelievers (Paul refers to this in another area); that is impossible in our time here on earth. I'll add a few of my thoughts.
I think we can apply that principal to our other "intimate" relationships. In addition to our marriages, I think it is possible to extend the wisdom to our close friendships, business partnerships, even our roomates. Even though we think we, as believers, are the ones who will influence these relationships, chances are more likely that they will influence us negatively.
Think of this: It is easier for someone to pull us off of a chair, rather than us pulling them up onto the chair. Be careful who you yoke with in your intimate relationships.
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12 comments:
Folks, a question was asked concerning this post: here it is(my response follows and names have been changed) "According to your latest blog, am I to understand that mixing non-christians with christians is incorrect? If so, Lisa would have never been born. I was saved, my wife was not, at the time of Lisa's conception and birth. The same holds true for her sister."
http://www.blueletterbible.org/cgi-bin/comm_read.pl?book=2Cr&chapter=6&verse=14&Comm=Comm%2Fmhc%2F2Cr%2F2Cr006.html%232%26Matthew%26Henry&Select.x=24&Select.y=13
Check out this link to the Blue Letter Bible regarding Matthew Henry's (a solid Bible commetator) comments on this passage.
1. In stated relations. It is wrong for good people to join in affinity with the wicked and profane; these will draw different ways, and that will be galling and grievous. Those relations that are our choice must be chosen by rule; and it is good for those who are themselves the children of God to join with those who are so likewise; for there is more danger that the bad will damage the good than hope that the good will benefit the bad.
Two observations: We must take the Bible for what it says, not what experiences anyone may have. We cannot exegete experiences. What I mean is that just because someone has experienced something different than the Scriptural rule (or wisdom), does not mean that (the experience)is what we can take as the new rule. This is an example of the is/ought fallacy. Just because something IS, does not mean it OUGHT to be that way.
Second, as believers, we must take the rule (or wisdom) and apply it to our life. (Never the exceptions) If you, or anyone was a Christian and married someone who is not a Christian, I could be mistaken but, that seems to violate this passage. If you, or anyone, became a Christian (and whose mate is not a believer), this is different. The principle is now that you ought to stay married unless the unbeliever asks for divorce.
This is the generally accepted understanding of what the passage says. This is one of those passages that has some disagreement as to the complete application for our lives. However, it is wise not to be unequally yoked with a nonbeliever, and in the context, Paul goes on to ask the various questions related to "light" fellowshipping with the "dark".
If you disagree, the burden of proof would seem to be in your court to demonstrate through Scripture (and its context) where this interpretation is mistaken-it could be.
This is a non-essential idea, but I think the principle is important and I think the interpretation is solid. Regardless of what you, or anyone else has experienced to the contrary.
Experience must be looked at through the lens of Scripture; never the other way around.
For more on the idea of experience, I recommend Stand to Reason's talk on "From Truth to Experience".
I hope that helps,
Derrick
I have two friends who share thoughts and conversations that only very close friends can do. I consider both very trustworthy. One is a christian and the other is not. I trust their friendships equally. My respect for their faith choice and theirs for mine is a part of our deep friendship. I believe that it is very possible to have a lifelong friendship of trust and understanding with a person who is not the same faith as yourself.
Russ,
I'm going to refer you back to what I said before.
I said, "We cannot exegete experiences. What I mean is that just because someone has experienced something different than the Scriptural rule (or wisdom), does not mean that (the experience)is what we can take as the new rule. This is an example of the is/ought fallacy. Just because something IS, does not mean it OUGHT to be that way.
Second, as believers, we must take the rule (or wisdom) and apply it to our life."
Russ, you have a good friend who is a nonbeliever, ok. This is not a bad thing in itself. I am not even sure the original passage is even speaking to this. However, if you were continually "yoked" with this person, he would begin to affect you. That is the nature of good friends. You finish each other's sentences, share common likes, etc.
But we cannot rework a Scriptural principle or completely ignore wisdom because of an exception, unless you can show that that is a good idea. I don't think it is. Nor do I think it is Biblical.
I could be wrong on this, but the ball is in your court to show me how I am. Though I am not sure this verse can apply directly to your situation.
I just know of the many times Scripture warns us to be careful who we hang out with because as another passage says, "bad company corrupts good character."
What do you folks think? Am I way off?
Regards,
Derrick
I enjoy the Pastors at the Crystal Cathedral. I suppose John 15.13 says it for me. " Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."
I have friends and family that are not saved. I don't know if "yoke" is really the proper term regarding my love for them, but it may indeed be accurate.
Case in point is a recent trip to Laughlin to meet family. One of them sat out by the pool with me, shaking from his need for another drug action. People walked by. Some looking at me in disgust due to my tattoos. The same people did not give my family member a second look. Point being, only The Lord can truly see inside of us. Instead of taking more of the overused prescription meds, this family member and I ate a huge meal together and went for a stroll down the riverwalk.
Many times it is not the saved who need to have concern for picking up the habits and ways of the unsaved. Many times it is those who profess to be saved that pass along bad habits to the unsaved.
I choose to stay with my close family and friends, unsaved or not. I do not believe I am the exception. Nor, do I believe this against any Scripture.
I appreciate your views and respect them. My views on the same subject just happen to differ in some ways.
There was a time when I was yoked to a fine Christian Lady in '79. I was the unclean during those times. She was the one saved. We worked together. She in a way was like my surrogate mom in those days. Her being yoked to me was in a great part, my being saved. I feel the same compassion for those in my life, unsaved or not. That's just me.
Here is an illustration that may appeal to you. At school, the kids are jumping off the swings, over and over. A rule is in place that instructs the children, “do not jump off the swings”. The reason is that the administration wants to avoid someone getting hurt while at their school. I come up and tell the administrator that her rule does not really need to be a rule because many students don’t get hurt.
Also,I ask her, how many students really get hurt after they jump, and the teachers are just stressing out by stopping the kids from doing what they want. And besides I don’t think the slide is dangerous at all.
The Biblical theme from the OT to the NT is that you ought not get married, have intimate relationships, with those that could drag you down, this primarilly seems to mean does not share your active faith.
What you have expressed with your stories is that you think the slide is more dangerous. Let me explain: You expressed in an email that you understood the point of the text, and then you tell stories that tell me you think the slide is dangerous, which is a different discussion.
1)I don’t know what the pastors at Crystal Cathedral have to do with the topic.
2)If you have tattoos, people will look at them-whether you like it or not.
3)If the Lord can truly see inside of us, how do you know the people passing by you, looking in disgust, were Christians?
4)While it may be true that saved folks teach the unsaved folks bad habits, this is beside the point. (sort of-it just proves my point that people influence others in their relationships)
If you continuously “hang out” with an unbeliever and are not actively seeking to influence this person, they will very likely influence you, even if you think they don’t. If this were not the case, it would seem silly for God’s word to tell us not to be hanging out in the den of thieves, and bad company corrupts good character and the other verses that carry this theme throughout Scripture.
Finally, all this to say...while the topic may be similar, the experiences you offer do not seem applicable to this particular passage. I leave you with a portion of my original comment" for there is more danger that the bad will damage the good than hope that the good will benefit the bad.
Derrick
I don't think that the unequally yolked issue has anything to do with the ability to have a friendship with a nonbeliever. I, too have friends that are nonbelievers. I also have friends who have fallen away from following the Christian faith. I still love those individuals and try to keep a relationship with them. However, being that they are not Christians, I cannot expect them to carry the same standards for behavior that I do. My goal is to live for Christ. Therefore, I will not participate in activities or condone activities that do not support my goal. This lends itself to not being able to have a close daily relationship with a nonbeliever. We still can have a very close relationship if we ignore the differences in values and beliefs. However, I do not feel that this is what I should do. I think that I should be expressing my views about what I think the bible says. For example....I have a friend that is a nonbeliever and does drugs. I love this individual, but must express that I think their behavior is wrong. We can both understand that we have differing views and still be friends. But, our time together will probably not be very comfortable because we have different values. That is the problem with having an unequally yolked close friendship.
I live by a basic code of the west, which is "your partner is your partner, win, lose, or draw." I stand by that. If I go down with one who I gave my life to defend, I do so. My very best friend died of a drug overdose. I was and am proud to say was yoked to him. I did my best, but my best was not good enough to save his life. I still believe that my christian foundation kept me in his always available grasp, and I was there for him. I live by that code for all I love and care for.
That sounds like a good friendship you had. Still, I feel you miss the point myself and Tracy have demonstrated. Plus, you still are misunderstanding and misapplying the 2 Corinthians passage to your personal situations. You may have the last word on this if you like.
Derrick
I agree with Derrick. I'm a Christian and have had a couple of non believing roommates. The first one was a really great girl. She was educated super cool and responsible. When she and I were living together I was new in my faith and even though she was a nice person her worldly advice was always against the spirit. I’m not a person that follows the crowd but after a while in her company I started compromise some of my beliefs. I wanted to walk in the Spirit but it was hard to do because I did not have any accountability with my roommate and even though she didn’t mean any harm she would always egg me on to feed my flesh. Currently I have been room mating with my “dear friend” another non believer for 6 months and his worldly ways are starting to affect my character. I am much stronger in my faith, I have accountably partners, prayer partners, I’m in discipleship, and have a very strong group of friends that are believers that are there for me. However, my roommate’s ways are starting to affect my Spirit. Yes, he lets me talk to him about Christ all the time and he’s a good person but his ways are rubbing off on me. Example my roommate cusses and gets angry all the time. I have not said a cuss word in 4 years. Not because I think I’m good or I want to look good but because I know what comes out of the mouth are the things that are in the heart. Well a couple of days ago my roommate was upset “again” about a bill so he started to use foul language and I ended up snapping back at him with a cuss word. I was heart broken and started to cry not because “oooh” I said a cuss word, but because my Father in heaven heard me. That came from six months of constantly hearing the things in his heart then it started to fill effect my heart.
The bible tells us that we live in this world but we are not of this world. I know a lot of atheists; I have family members, I know people that worship idols and others that do not share my same faith. I minister and love on them every time God gives me an opportunity but, I know that I can not hang out with them to often because satan will use any opportunity he has to make us fall and yes bad company does corrupt good character. I have seen this happen with all kinds of people even those with really strong faith.
Romans 12:2 (New Living Translation)
2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
P.S. Sorry guys for the typos. It's pretty late.
I agree with Derrick. I'm a Christian and have had a couple of non believing roommates. The first one was a really great girl. She was educated super cool and responsible. When she and I were living together I was new in my faith and even though she was a nice person her worldly advice was always against the spirit. I’m not a person that follows the crowd but after a while in her company I started compromise some of my beliefs. I wanted to walk in the Spirit but it was hard to do because I did not have any accountability with my roommate and even though she didn’t mean any harm she would always egg me on to feed my flesh. Currently I have been room mating with my “dear friend” another non believer for 6 months and his worldly ways are starting to affect my character. I am much stronger in my faith, I have accountably partners, prayer partners, I’m in discipleship, and have a very strong group of friends that are believers that are there for me. However, my roommate’s ways are starting to affect my Spirit. Yes, he lets me talk to him about Christ all the time and he’s a good person but his ways are rubbing off on me. Example my roommate cusses and gets angry all the time. I have not said a cuss word in 4 years. Not because I think I’m good or I want to look good but because I know what comes out of the mouth are the things that are in the heart. Well a couple of days ago my roommate was upset “again” about a bill so he started to use foul language and I ended up snapping back at him with a cuss word. I was heart broken and started to cry not because “oooh” I said a cuss word, but because my Father in heaven heard me. That came from six months of constantly hearing the things in his heart then it started to fill effect my heart.
The bible tells us that we live in this world but we are not of this world. I know a lot of atheists; I have family members, I know people that worship idols and others that do not share my same faith. I minister and love on them every time God gives me an opportunity but, I know that I can not hang out with them to often because satan will use any opportunity he has to make us fall and yes bad company does corrupt good character. I have seen this happen with all kinds of people even those with really strong faith.
Romans 12:2 (New Living Translation)
2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
P.S. Sorry guys for the typo's it pretty late.
Elaine, Thanks for stopping by. And thanks for adding your comments. Hopefully you can add your insight to some of the more recent posts as well.
I think you have given a great example of the difficulty in living godly while "hanging out/being yoked" with someone who is not (I would add that a lukewarm Christian could also be a bad influence)
I love the Romans passage in the NLT. Being transformed by changing the way you think...Too many Christians give careful consideration to the development to thinking Biblically. I love it.
Thanks again. (BTW, how did you come across the blog?
Derrick
Keep posting stuff like this i really like it
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